Archive for the ‘Dreams’ Category

I have horrible dreams on a regular basis.  Sometimes they include people I know, and sometimes they include people I don’t know.  Some are worse than others.  But they have a couple recurrent themes.  Anxiety – like the one where I’m running down a gravel road in a dress and high heels trying to make it somewhere for something important.  I’m normally in Colorado in that dream, which is weird, because Colorado is the place I am least likely to wear a dress or heels in real life.  Right now I would be really pumped (seriously, stop) to wear heels anywhere, but my foot refuses to comply with these desires.

My other recurrent dream involves disasters.  Sometimes it is natural disaster, and sometimes it is horrible accident, and other times it involves serial killers dressed as cops knocking on the door of the cabin in the woods in the middle of the night.  Did you see the movie Secret Window?  Cause I did.  I’m starting to think maybe I watch too many movies and entirely too many crime shows.

When I was in the ATL last weekend, Christy’s neighbor got locked out and came by her apartment to get a spare key.  Because she is someone important in the HOA, she has the keys to all the condos in her building.  I’m sure I knew that there was a person like this in most condo associations, but I had two immediate thoughts.  1.  Damn, she is trusted and responsible, this is what happens when you are a lawyer.  2.  If anyone is ever murdered in her building, she will be an immediate suspect because she has everyone’s spare key.  And then I had a third thought, which was, what is wrong with you that you think about this sort of thing?

Wish me luck, I’m off to test the ole foot out in Drew’s yoga class.  I may be crying tonight, but right now I’m really excited.

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and difficulties and biting off more than you can chew.  My thoughts have to do with marathons and grad school and running over the people in your life with your dreams and being jealous of other people’s dreams and being frustrated and fulfilled by your dreams.  About how learning to do something well and taking the time to actually focus long enough on one dream before you jump to another dream and not letting the disappointment of last years dream keep you from this year’s dream. 

But I’m rambling.  I’m not really thinking about dreams the way I just described.  I’m thinking more about having a goal that seems overwhelming and completing it, and how it can be exhilarating and at the same time something of a let down until you find another goal.  Because it leaves a space.  And often time, space is something I can be uncomfortable with. 

Right now I’m completely overwhelmed with my house and weddings and work and the fact that the Masters is next week and I complain that all I want is a day to do nothing.  But when that day comes, when I have a few weekends without plans, the first weekend without plans will be difficult for me.  I’ll feel like I’m missing something or that I should be engaged in something, when really I just need space to breathe. 

I’ve b een thinking about this because Ana has been writing about how she decided to quit smoking because she needed a new personal challenge.  And then Judith wrote about how cooking elaborate meals for her children on their birthdays challenged her and made her feel special.  And their writing really resonated with me this week. 

So I’ve been thinking.  Thinking and packing and cleaning and working and shopping for things I MUST HAVE (like a bathroom sink), and painting and untangling garden hoses and peeling off tape and trying not to collapse from exhaustion. 

Speaking of…the sheep need me to go count them so they can go to sleep too.

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Good Morning!

I dreamed I punched someone in the face last night.  I’ve never punched someone in the face in my life.  In my dream I was concerned because it didn’t hurt my hand that much when I punched them and I guess I’ve always heard that it really hurts your hand when you punch someone in the face. 

Honestly, more of my dream was devoted to the fact that I wasn’t hurt by it than who I actually punched in the face and what happened to them.  I came to the conclusion that I must not have punched them hard enough if it didn’t hurt my hand.  Great.  Maybe I’ll try harder next time I get in a fist fight in my dream. 

It was cold here at the beginning of the week but it is warming up nicely and the days are flying by.  Which is exciting because the Masters will be here before I know it!!!  I’m so excited.  Part of the fun of it is the anticipation.  Last year I got a little burned out by the weekend so hopefully I can get it together and not burn out. 

Briscoe needs a bath real bad.  Oh, and I got my hair cut yesterday.  I really like it. 

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Forecast: Abundant Sunshine

It is a tremendously beautiful day.  Tomorrow night is a full moon with a total lunar eclipse.  How exciting is that?  Full moons give me CRAZY dreams.  I really hesitate to tell y’all what I dreamed about last night, because I feel y’all will either think I am making it up, or that I am in fact, nuts.  It is hard to believe that I could have so many whacked out dreams in one night, but hey.  I don’t think I’m creative enough to make this stuff up while I’m awake. 

Dream #1-

Okay, the first part of my dream involved a the ghost of a woman.  She haunted a portion of a school or a camp or some sort of institution that I attended.  She was something like the ghosts in Harry Potter, because she wasn’t mean, she just didn’t like a lot of people.  She wore an apron and a chef hat and she had a particular corridor that she haunted (hah.  literally).  The specifics are fuzzy, but she got really upset at one of the students, and I had to talk to her about how he wasn’t actually a threat to her and that she would like him if they got to know each other. A strange twist to this story is that the ghost really liked diet coke. 

Dream #2

This dream was a lot more realistic, in that it is something that could actually happen, but, not really.  It was the night before a football game, and I was with a large group of people who were all going to the game together.  We were all going to travel to Athens (I assume) and go to the game.  It was a late afternoon/night game, but obviously it would be an all day affair.  It was a very important game that I had to go to, and was very excited about.  We were in the mountains somewhere, and would be traveling from the mountains to Athens late that night.  It was pouring down rain.  Total monsoon rain.  And we had all our bags packed and ready to be loaded in the car.  Well, somehow, I realize that the day after the football game  I was suppose to take the bar exam.  (in real life I am taking the south carolina bar this summer).  So in my dream the south carolina bar exam was the day after this really big football game that I had to go to. 

In realizing that I am suppose to take the bar, I also realize that I have not studied for five minutes and I am totally unprepared.  I also do not have any materials with which to prepare.  I started asking everyone if they knew anyone with a PMBR book.  While I am freaking out about this, people are loading the cars with our luggage.  Somehow, my luggage gets set out in the rain and my bag (it was a sort of very bradley bag, even though I don’t own one of those) filled up with water completely. 

I become very upset that my bag has filled up completely with water, and that I have to take the bar exam, and that the only time I am going to have to study is going to be if I wake up early the next morning and go to the law library and try to find some materials and cram for a little while before the game. 

My bag is sitting on the tailgate of an SUV, and I am trying to dump all the standing water from the inside of my bag out onto the ground, but it isn’t working very well.  So now on top of everything I don’t know what I’m going to wear the game either. 

I’m not sure how it all resolved, other than the fact that I woke up this morning and none of the problems in my dream were true.  I’ve read that having anxiety dreams is a healthy way for your mind to deal with the stress and anxiety in your life that you can’t process during the day.  But by processing it in your dreams at night, your next day is calmer and less anxious than it would be if you didn’t have the dreams.  I hope this is true, because that would mean that my mind is super healthy.  Otherwise, the alternative is that I am not stable, which is less comforting. 

I don’t feel very anxious today.   

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Dream Update

As we get dangerously close to a full moon (96% full tonight), my dreams get more real and more crazy. 

Last night I dreamed I was a professional surfer, on an all female surfing team.  And we were surfing in crazy waves, like it took us a good ten minutes just to get past the breakers.  So my dream was full of waves crashing down on top of me, while I tried to swim through them.  Sweet.  But at the same time I was there voluntarily and thought it was fun. 

In my dream I forgot to put on sunscreen before venturing into the water.  And I didn’t want to go all the way back in because it took me to long to get out there.  So I spent an hour with no sunscreen.  I think it was cloudy in my dream, and I know I had on a wetsuit, so it was really just my face. 

I ended up with a very bad sunburn on my face.  Those who know me, know I can look at the sun wrong and burn.  And I am very careful to not get burned, as skin cancer runs in my family. 

Very vivid dream.  Very confusing.  (for the record, I don’t know how to surf, never really even tried). 

It is dark and rainy here today.  But cooler than yesterday. 

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Ahh, Miscellaneous.  I’ll never learn how to spell that word without spell check.  The same way I will ALWAYS be confused about Affect and Effect.  I know it isn’t difficult, I know it should be simple and I’m entirely too educated to not know the difference.  Back off, maybe I have mild brain damage. 

So, just thought I would share a few things with y’all.  I recently purchased the Colbie Caillat CD, and I highly recommend it.  It is definitely girl music, but it is upbeat and soothing, sort of something you can tune out, but good lyrics too.  I like it. My favorites are Oxygen and Midnight Bottle. 

I also recently purchased the Luke Bryan CD – he is from Albany, Ga, and is fun.  He wrote Billy Currington’s song – Good Directions, and I think this is his first CD.  It makes me happy.  My favorite songs are We Rode in Trucks and You Make Me Want To.   

Travers says I listen to terrible music.  Who asked him anyway?

I’ve recently found a few new websites that I like a lot –

The Pasty Quail – this is site run by a few law students at UGA.  Lots of interesting articles and outside links with blurbs.  I was thoroughly entertained. 

Walking to the Shops Damages the Planet More than Going by Car – I love this article.  Honestly – I’m all about the environment, I really am, but most people don’t even think through the real impact of their actions – and what might seem "good" is sometimes "bad", or, simply, "not good". 

Binge Drinking is Good For You – I just thought this article was hilarious.  I mean – it doesn’t have a real serious point, but it made me laugh.  I like columnists.  Especially British ones.

Oh, and speaking of substance abuse – if it ever comes down to it – please send me to this Rehab.  I feel at peace in the mountains.   

And last but not least – what I think of as the funniest SNL skit I’ve ever seen, starring Lindsey – who has been lucky enough to go to rehab at the Cirque Lodge –

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It was orange and big and full.  And I’m still having crazy dreams.  I know y’all get tired of me writing about them, but I can’t help it. 

Last night the people in my dream where Libby and Robert – Libby and I had met Robert somewhere to go skiing.

Oh, and Emily was in my dream too, Emily lived in the place where we were skiing.  It was a really small town, and it was my birthday, but my birthday cake said happy birthday jennifer, and I ate the whole thing.  It was a little cake.  Something scandalous had just occured in the town and all the locals were kind of on edge.  And Emily wanted to tell us about the scandal but couldn’t because we were in a crowded restaurant. 

  Then Robert had to go back to Japan, and Libby and I were going to continue our travels to my parent’s mountain house.  And there were new  ski resorts being built on the side of the mountain that you could see from the road- but they didn’t look right, they looked like a fair being set up on the side of the mountain with lots of big colorful tents and stuff, and chairlifts.

But then Libby realized that she had to be somewhere else and caught a ride back somewhere and I continued on to the mountain house by myself.  It was at my parent’s mountain house, but it didn’t look like our mountain house and it was in Colorado instead of Georgia.   

And Briscoe was at the house with me, and for some reason she had to stay in the basement (the real house doesn’t have a basement). So I was suppose to be with Libby, but I was alone with Briscoe.  And Mama kept calling to check on us, and I didn’t want to tell her it was just me in the house by myself in the woods because I knew it would bother her, but I also didn’t want something to happen to me. 

And then all the sudden there was a knock at the door that scared me to death.  Briscoe had somehow or another gotten out of her cage in the basement and out of the house and a nice neighbor had found her. 

That is all I can remember. 

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